An Invitation in the Midst of Change

“We took the job.”

My fingers trembled around my phone as I hit “send.” The lump in my throat made my neck ache as I attempted to hold back tears. I could hear the muffled words of my husband and our Uber driver talking about this “awesome city” that would soon be our home. I tried to focus on what they are saying but my thoughts were filled with the dozens of things we would need to do in preparation for our move. My husband would start his new job in less than two weeks and, not wanting to do life in separate states, we would need to sell our house as soon as possible. My mind was swirling at the thought of telling our three children about the decision we’d just made. What about our parents? Our friends? Who would come to the kids’ birthday parties? What about our commitments and our obligations and the plans already written in pen on next month’s calendar?

With the four words of that text message, everything was changing.

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Lighting the Fire of Risk | Rachel Trigueiro

My friend Rachel is writing a legacy of “yes” by walking in faith through both the big, scary things, as well as the smaller, unnoticed things. I asked her to share a bit of what being a risk-taker looks like for her, in this season. I have read this post at least six times for my own personal benefit and encouragement and I am thrilled to get to pass it along to you. May your soul be strengthened and blessed by Rachel’s lovely and vulnerable words. 

 “Make your choice, adventurous Stranger,
Strike the bell and bide the danger,
Or wonder, till it drives you mad,
What would have followed if you had.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Magician’s Nephew

Uprooting our family from California to Seattle was just the beginning.  THIS WAS IT. We had made the (huuuuuge) decision to go, so now we were official RISK TAKERS.

So brave, so scared, so excited, so CRAZY.

In 30 days we made the decision to up and move our family: no job. no house. no plan. no community (except a few friends) AND 3 KIDS in tow. It felt pretty brave. Pretty risky (actually, felt like it couldn’t get much riskier). But it wasn’t until we moved that I learned the bravest moments were yet to come.

It wasn’t easy leaving, emotionally or practically. We were sad to leave our families-for our kids to leave their grandparents and cousins. And it was a lot of work with tiny children, a big house and A LOT of stuff in very little time (thank you, Lord for sisters who help get that crap done).

BUT, it was exciting. New. Thrilling. It was an ADVENTURE. And if you’re anything like me, you know exactly what I’m talking about because just hearing that word feeds your soul. There’s a desire deep down in you that craves adventure. Something new and something risky. And it’s those adrenaline-pumped emotions that make the tough ones easier. Saying good-bye is hard, but looking ahead to the unknown—endless possibilities—is life giving.

But all of that quiets down. The fanfare, the excitement, the mystery. Your people are no longer around. Eventually, those dreams, prayers, promises & hopes turn into waiting… Wondering. And you find yourself asking questions… Read More

When Silence Becomes Sin

My sophomore year of college I studied abroad in Guatemala. I spent most of my time working as an intern in a home for severely abused and neglected girls. Over those few months I witnessed, first hand, what evil can do to an innocent child. I learned that the enemy doesn’t play fair or “take it easy” on someone because they are only five-years-old or have already been victimized. I watched demonic forces try to kill children.

When my semester abroad was over, the plan was for me to return to college in San Diego where I would spend my weeks in classrooms with ocean views and my weekends taking students out on snorkeling trips and mud caving adventures.

I remember sitting on the edge of my bunk bed at the girls home and thinking about the “what next” question. I knew I had seen too much to ever attempt to go back to my old routine. I was jaded, I was angry, I had lost much of my white, middle class, Southern Baptist innocence and I felt scared.

I remember crying out to God and asking Him what it was that I should do next. Do I go back to my posh and comfortable and beautiful school in San Diego? Do I stay in Guatemala? Where do I belong? What do I do with what I’ve seen and heard and held in my hands?

In His faithfulness, the Lord told me two things: 1. “You will never again feel comfortable anywhere on earth. Your home is in heaven. It is ok to feel “unsettled” as it will be a constant reminder that your earthly city is a temporary dwelling place while you are on-mission with me.” 2. “Be like the ‘shouting voice’ in Isaiah 58. Do not be silent about what you have seen and heard and held in your hands.” Read More

When Risking Leaves You Robbed and Disturbed

On January 12, 2010, the nation of Haiti was hit with a powerful 7.0 earthquake that resulted in massive destruction and countless deaths. Upon hearing the news of the devastation and the many people who had lost limbs as a result of the fallen debris, my husband and I felt God asking us to go and serve the wounded using his skills as a Prosthetist and my skills as his team-mate. We kissed our 16-month-old son “goodbye” and left him with grandparents as we headed to Haiti for 11 days. “Mission of Hope,” an incredible ministry just outside of Port-au-Prince, had (just weeks before the earthquake) opened one of the only prosthetic labs in the country in an empty room of their hospital, originally designed as the morgue.  The experience was life changing and played a significant role in our decision to pursue the adoption of a child with limb difference. I recently came across a blog post I wrote shortly after our trip. We returned home from the airport and discovered that, while overseas, our apartment had been robbed and all of my heirloom jewelry, including my wedding rings, had been stolen.  I wrote this post, over six years ago, as a sort of altar to the Lord as I was processing our time in Haiti. It continues to serve as a powerful reminder of God’s heart and faithfulness every time I read it. I hope that it blesses you also. 

Disturbed– May 3rd, 2010

I have sat down at least four times to write about our recent trip to Haiti. Each time I make an attempt, I go blank on what to say. When I try to organize my thoughts I find myself distracted with moments of trial and victory in Haiti, followed by feelings of violation with the home break-in, and ending with the overwhelmed reality of us moving in three weeks. Read More

Coffee in Heaven: Living This First Life Well

I just bought plane tickets for a funeral this weekend. Friday morning at 4 am I’ll hop on the train to the airport and fly to California to celebrate the life of my Aunt Sharon, who I am sure is now sipping coffee with Jesus at some corner cafe in heaven.  Sharon Runner was an incredible human being whosharon made a beautiful and lasting impact on her community. She spoke out against injustice and stood up on behalf of the weak and vulnerable. She spent her life working in both the private and public sectors, serving as a California State Senator from 2011 till she passed away this month. She was unashamed of her faith and was so much like Jesus in how she proclaimed truth in love, without passing judgment. She loved her husband and children and grandchildren well, and she loved Jesus the most. Her resume was as lengthy as it was impressive and her voice was important. I am honored to call myself her niece and I am so grateful for the legacy of love and boldness and service that she left for the women in our family to walk in. Hers was a life well lived.

This morning I saw an ad on social media that read, “Stop acting like you live twice. Make your days count.” The fancy, bold script sat in the middle of a beautiful, coastal scene with a long, winding road following the edge of the green cliffs. Beautiful. Inspirational, even. I used to subscribe to this way of thinking.  This fear of wasting what little time we might have on earth hung over me like a cloud. What if I miss something? What if there is this great opportunity that God puts in front of me and I didn’t see it or I said no because I was too busy with something else? Read More